The journey up the mountain of forgiveness begins in simplicity, Seek Him First. It is the one place all journeys should commence. Under my power, I will fail. In Him alone I find success.
Through my intentional choice to let go of my known way of life, an entirely new world is made known.
When an entirely new world opens up, it allows Him to do a new thing. God is all about new.
“Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it?” Isaiah 43:18-19
Forgiveness is for me; it is for my heart and my heart alone. Will the universe know I forgave it for the injustices heaped upon me? Will the streams run uphill or the birds sing in unison when I let the pain of the past escape the death it deserves? No. Not at all. Instead, all the Heavenly hosts will rejoice singing “glory hallelujah!” One more heart has prepared Him room. A ticker-tape parade of praise falls from Heaven above when one heart makes room. When there’s room, He takes up residence, when He takes up residence, He is Lord.
Stop the presses! I’m not there yet. Hold the confetti, deflate the balloons, I’m standing at the base of this mountain wondering “how the heck?” Maybe I should wander the desert just a little while longer, say forty more years? Maybe seventy, while I set up camp here and make a garden? God won’t forsake me in the desert; He will never leave my side no matter how long I stare at the base of this mountain. He sits and patiently waits for me to take a step, just one step, in an ascending manner; waiting to be Lord of all.
Comforts of the Past
My troubled heart is stubborn and unyielding. I do not want to let go of my known way of life. I’m so comfortable in slavery it’s become common and familiar. I know the rhythm of the waves and can predict the tide of my life with haunting accuracy. When I take that first step up the mountain of forgiveness, I leave the comfort of consistency behind.
My confession, I long for a pattern. I long for repetitious, every day the same boring day as before. Consequently, I drown in the pond of stagnation. I never know when the bottom will fall out of my world; therefore, I do everything I can to keep it as stable as possible. Climbing this mountain could and will change everything.
I have worked for so many years to translate the language of the mystery in which I live to find predictability in the chaos. I am comfortable here. In my comfort, however, I become complacent. It’s only through Christ doing a new thing that my faith deepens, and my heart is emptied leaving room for Him.
My gentle savior reminds me that He did not call me to permeate in the pond of stagnation, this is not my home, and a rolling rock gathers no moss. My life is a journey from here to there. Here is not my home, but there is a long way off.
“Take up residence in me, allow me to be your home. Where ever you are, there I am also.”
Forgiveness will only do one thing for me, set me free. I’ve been captive for ages, wanting to be free. I’m clueless as to what freedom looks like, but long to find it and learn how to live in it.
I have seen too much, been hurt too deeply, and live bound in fear. I’m afraid that if I leave the comfort of predictability that I will have to walk through hell again. I cannot do hell again. I have been down on my knees begging for life and seen horrors unimaginable through the unknown, unpredictable world. I do not want to step out of comfort, seeking forgiveness and the uncharted territory it will bring.
I am afraid to walk a new road again. I walked a new path once, and it led me straight into the pit of despair. I tell myself this is an entirely different road paved with the promises and strength of the Almighty.
“…‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit’ says the Lord Almighty. ‘What are you, mighty mountain? Before Zerubbabel, you will become level ground’…” Zechariah 4:6-7
I am in the palm of His hand; He’s got my back! He knows every hurt in my heart and every tear I have shed. He saved every tear. They are sitting on a shelf marked “grace.” He has covered them with His blood spilled out for me.
God never pushes beyond what I can withstand; He has promised to walk beside me through the valley of the shadow of death. He gently nudges me and allows me to climb at my pace. When I tell He who draws the boundaries that I have exceeded my limitations, He uses His unique God chalk to draw new boundaries then reminds me I am still well within the lines. He desperately wants to do a new thing within my heart. No more old, stop living in the past. His way new opens up an entirely new world right before my eyes. Taste and see!
Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see--how good God is! Blessed are you who run to Him. Psalm 34:8 Click To Tweet
There is no going around, only up. My deepest desire is to see Him, to know His freedom and the only way to accomplish my heart’s desire is up. Deep cries out to deep as I place one foot in front of the other in an ascending fashion as I set out to make room in the inn of my heart; a journey up the mountain of forgiveness.
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