Ninety-nine posts ago found me clueless. One post ago, just as clueless. Ninety-nine posts is a lot of words for she, who cannot correctly stammer one sentence aloud. Ninety-nine posts, I’m reminded of high school. I sit for hours staring at a blank screen thinking I’m thinking, but I’m listening to music. No mom, I am seriously thinking not just listening to music. I’m lying, I’m listening to every word of the songs that play while thinking. “He says come to me cuz I’m everything” the words sing to me at this moment. “Come to me because I am everything.” He is, and I run to Him. He is my everything.
Whether traveling the nation, working in the yard, sitting in church, or driving I constantly think about what I am going to write. What do I have to say that is worth the read. Four hundred and sixty-two drafts sit half written, six different notebooks scattered in each room and in the car, ninety-nine posts later and I still wonder what to say. I write what’s in my heart and pray no one ever reads it. God is funny that way because blogs are for reading. I still say this was all His idea.
You are here on my journey, my one-hundredth display of words. If you care to go all the way back to the beginning, be my guest. Hello world! began this whole process. I didn’t even know how to change the title of the post. I’m usually a little more “put together” with anything I put together. But this came differently, I acted first and put it all together last week (well, it seemed like last week).
Ninety-nine posts about God, God’s hand in my life, and God’s hand in nature. I talk about God A LOT! Care to take a gander of what that’s done to my life? Care to wonder where searching every day for God leads? Relating God to every situation? Seeking God and finding Him? I think He knew. He’s God, of course, He knew. He did this on purpose, and I bit, hook line and sink ‘er. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Ninety-nine times I have laid the pieces of my heart upon His altar, given it over to Him to bind together.
Ninety-nine out-poring of words. I am redeemed, and I am not ashamed to proclaim it. I am rescued, called, and set apart.
On ninety-nine occasions, I have laughed, I have cried.
Ninety-nine healings and there is a crack in the wall around my heart; a scared little girl peeks out feeling slightly safer than before.
Ninety-nine leaps of faith and I can almost spell the word brave without looking.
Ninety-nine lessons on faith and grace.
Ninety-nine posts and the person touched is me. God reaches down and digs hidden words buried in my heart. I write them in complete sentences (mostly using correct grammar, thank you mom) and He touches me, he breaks me; He heals me, He teaches me, He stretches me. I’ve cried, I’ve laughed, I’ve learned.
How can I repay the Lord for all His goodness to me? I will lift the cup of salvation and call on the name of the Lord. I will fulfill my vows to the Lord in the presence of all His people, in the courts of the house of the Lord–In your midst, O Jerusalem. Praise the Lord. Psalm 116:12-14; 18-19.
Welcome to day five. Gratitude is praise. Pure and simple praise offered back to the one who loves me enough to use my words to touch my heart. With my words, in a constant circle rippling only to come back to touch the very heart of where they all began, I offer praise. Praise to the only one who is worthy. Praise to my Redeemer. Praise to my Salvation. Praise to my God. I am thankful I call Him Lord.
And your Love crashes over me, in the endless sea of your presence I drift, untethered, unbound, lost completely, unanchored in you. Far from the shore of where I began ninety-nine posts ago, the deep within you calls to the deep within me. You called me to you on the waves, where feet fail but you…you are…beyond the scope of the words in my vocabulary. On my knees, my outstretched arms offer my deepest praise, without a word my soul sings to you.
This is one-hundred, an offering of thanksgiving. Now, I begin again, for every day is new.